


Weak And Powerless

by fireflysglow_archivist



Category: Firefly
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2006-01-03
Updated: 2006-01-03
Packaged: 2019-04-29 06:31:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,153
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14467005
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fireflysglow_archivist/pseuds/fireflysglow_archivist
Summary: Mal used to love the lonely life he lead, but now it seems nothing but empty.





	Weak And Powerless

**Author's Note:**

> Note from alice ttlg, the archivist: this story was originally archived at [Firefly’s Glow](https://fanlore.org/wiki/Firefly%27s_Glow), and was moved to the AO3 as part of the Open Doors project in 2018. I tried to reach out to all creators about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are the creator and would like to claim this work, please contact me using the e-mail address on [Firefly's Glow collection profile](https://archiveofourown.org/collections/fireflysglow/profile).
> 
>  **Author's notes:** Spoilers: Movie spoilers lie withen, don't read if you haven't seen it.  
>  Warnings: Mal/River smoochies, you no likey, you no ready.

  
Author's notes: Spoilers: Movie spoilers lie withen, don't read if you haven't seen it.  
Warnings: Mal/River smoochies, you no likey, you no ready.  


* * *

Weak And Powerless

## Weak And Powerless

Title: Weak And Powerless  
Author: Claramata  
Pairing: Mal/River  
Disclaimer: Firefly belongs to Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, Fox, Universal, and many others. "Weak and Powerless" is by A Perfect Circle. I mean no harm by this piece of fanfiction and I'm not making any money off of it. Author's Notes: This is my first Mal/River fic, I'm not very good at writing River (I'm not crazy or smart enough to get the crazy/smart talk XD). I heard this song on a mix tape my friend made me and I thought it was perfect for the pairing, I don't know why. Anyway, enjoy. 

* * *

Mal felt the world was against him, or at the very least God. Ever since Miranda, just keeping Serenity in the air wasn't enough, because death had followed him out to the black, it'd touched his crew, his family. And he couldn't keep it going like this, he wasn't ready for his little sanctuary to become a place of mourning, but it had, and there was no stopping it. He sat in the cockpit, gazing out over the vast emptiness of space that he used to think was a fitting home for someone as empty as he was, but now it just seemed like a long stretch of lonely, and he was sick and tired of being lonely. He looked over at the girl in the copilot's seat, who was staring at him with deep, knowing eyes, eyes far to old for a girl that young to have. "Guess you know what's troublin' me, don't you, Little Albatross?"

"Alone in the dark, used to like it, but now you can't stand it. You want to see light again." She said softly, her serious face beautiful, but her haunted eyes unnerving as she kept eye contact with him for a little longer than was comfortable. "You miss them," she said simply, as if to explain what made perfect sense to him, one of the few things out of her mouth that had. 

* * *

Tilling my own grave to keep me level  
Jam another dragon down the hole  
Diggin' to rhythm and the echo of a solitary siren

One that pushes me along and leaves me so... 

* * *

"I have a feeling we all do darlin'." He sighed and looked at one of the plastic dinosaurs that were lined up along the pilot's console, a memorial to the man who should be in the chair Mal now sat in. River just pulled her legs up to her chest and leaned her head against her knees, silently looking at him, her eyes seeing right through him, seeing through to the core of him, it unnerved him to know that she could hear every thought in his head, but it comforted him too, to know that someone on this crew knew he wasn't as strong as he tried to be. Long graceful legs moved and River stood, her bare feet making no sound on the metal floor as she stepped over to him, putting a hand on his shoulder. 

"You're stronger than you think," Said the girl, no woman, with a soft, sad smile on her face. She wasn't at her crazy best today obviously, since she was making sense. And what scared him now was how he saw her now that she was making more sense. For the past couple of weeks he'd started to see the woman in her and it frightened him, because now that he'd started seeing her as a woman, he knew he couldn't stop. 

* * *

Desperate and ravenous  
I'm so weak and powerless over you

Someone feed the monkey while I dig in search of China 

White as Dracula as I approach the bottom 

Desperate and ravenous   
I'm so weak and powerless over you 

* * *

Her big dark eyes seemed to glint and the way she looked at him now, with her head cocked to the side, Mal knew she'd heard that last thought, gorramit, he thought, now what? She smiled and kissed his cheek, saying softly so close to him that her warm breath caressed his chilled skin, "No longer little, no longer sleeping, I'm ready, are you?" He swallowed heavily and stood, moving away from her as quickly as he could. 

"You gotta learn about the idea of personal space, Little Albatross." He said and started for the door, but a small, warm hand around his wrist stopped him before he could get far. He turned to look at the damned confusing young woman who now held him captive with a gentle hand and dangerously deep eyes. And he was suddenly deathly afraid of what this woman would do, not so much physically, though if she wanted to she could kill him ten different ways with just her little finger, but emotionally. She took a step forward and he took a step back, "Again, personal space," His mouth was telling her, but she could hear his thoughts, he knew, and his mind was screaming closer, closer, please. And she smiled and took another step, he stayed still this time and she approached him, Her free hand coming up to touch his face. "Not empty, not whole, but not gone," He didn't understand what she meant but he didn't have to because she soon leaned up and kissed him, and God help him, he kissed her. He knew that if the Shepard's heaven existed, the preacher was looking down on him, screaming about a special Hell, but he didn't care at this point, because for the first time in a long time, he felt something other than the crushing loneliness. 

* * *

Little angel go away  
Come again some other day  
The devil has my ear today  
I'll never hear a word you say  
He promised I would find a little solace and some peace of mind

Whatever just as long as I don't feel so... 

Desperate and ravenous   
I'm so weak and powerless over you 

* * *

When they broke apart he looked down at the beautiful girl in his arms and smiled. "I'm not so strong against you, little Albatross". She just leaned against him and murmured something that he couldn't make out, but he was sure it was nonsensical and crazy, he chuckled and held her tighter. He wasn't sure what the next day in the black would bring, but somehow he knew it would be a little bit brighter.

* * *

 

 

 

 

 

 

Title:   **Weak And Powerless**   
Author:   **Claramata**   [website]   
Details:   **Standalone**  |  **PG**  |  **het**  |  **5k**  |  **01/03/06**   
Characters:  Malcolm, River   
Pairings:  Mal/River   
Summary:  Mal used to love the lonely life he lead, but now it seems nothing but empty.   
Notes:  Spoilers: Movie spoilers lie withen, don't read if you haven't seen it.   
Warnings: Mal/River smoochies, you no likey, you no ready.   
  



End file.
